let there be light!!!

It's dark here...Not just because it is getting really dark outside but i need to change lightbulbs in living room LOL...I hate changing them as it's a right kerfuffle...I have a very modern, cool light fitting with finger shades on it...In order to change the bulbs i have to get up on a ladder, use an allen key to unscrew the metal arms...Then i get down off the ladder and unscrew the finger shade, then have to use a different allen key to release the halogen bulb...Then got to go through whole rigmarole in reverse ROFL...My younger sis was looking at similar light fittings for the house they are building...I warned her NO don't get them it's too much hassle...Woke up today to find 3 have gone out and only have 1 spare in the flat.

Bought a small 128mb memory card for the camcorder thingy today although i am going to get a bigger 1gb one...When i have the other bigger one i will keep it for video recording and the small one for taking pics :o) ...Got told if 128mb one is used for just video could get 20 mins of film...Had a call again from G's school but he was okies...I had got a letter home last week asking permission for something which i duly signed and gave to G to hand back...Had he done that had he heck...They'd asked in home school book for the last 2 days but G had left it at school for last 2 days <sigh> ...His school bag is like a black hole...Things go in there never to reappear...One main problem with his aspergers is his memory for everyday stuff...It's just not there at all and i can't see it getting any better but hey ho.

I have put a christmas song on my journal but it won't play...I did exactly what sara said and still won't work at all...Maybe it's because mine is in wav format and not mp3 dunno...Got a call from one of K's friends up here this afternoon...It's her 18th today and she is moving to a new flat...So nice person here is going to help her move on fri...Would have done it tomorrow but i have a support group meeting in the morning and may be going for lunch or at least a nice coffee after...Depends who all turn up really...Am trying to stay positive and not worry too much about K...Easier said than done when she's 140 odd miles away and mobileless...I wanteverything to come back normal but at same time i don't...It would be better if they found something as at least then we'd know and something could be done...Anyways better go and change one lightbulb LOL...Am severely acrophobic to point where i have problems standing on a ladder...Next time i buy a light fitting it will be one where the bulbs can be changed easily <ggg>

Toodle pip tc xx

Update and other stuff

Finally spoke to K online less than an hour ago...The blood tests came back normal so she is being refered to a neurologist...This apparently is to rule out epilepsy...It's been so many years since M saw anyone about the epilepsy he had i can't remember if he saw a neurologist or not...To be honest he was in hospital on the ward from having more fits when someone saw him and to me it was just the specialist...Have no idea how long she will have to wait to be seen but am sure i will find out soon as she knows.

M came home today chuffed to bits with himself...At assembly today he was accompanying the music teach on the drums to all the songs they sang :o) ...He's also come home with the words to Band Aid 'Do they know it's christmas' so he can learn his parts...The lines he is singing he told me names of the original stars who sang them...Not last years ones but the ones from 1984 :o) Lastly a big thank you to Sara for my Christmas siggy tag :o)

Toodle pip tc xx

 

Tuesday

Posted K's christmas decorations down to her this afternoon hopefully they won't take long to get there...Even though most of her birthday cards were posted 1st class they took 4-5 days to get there...This morning when me and G got up when we looked out the kitchen window the moon was fabulous...It was a very very slim crescent just hanging there in the dawn light...By the time M got up at 8 it had disappeared...Wish i had woken him earlier to see it.

Have tried to put music onto my journal with some help from sara but failed miserably...Me and techy stuff just don't mix very well ROFL...Maybe am using wrong song format or something...Maybe the song name is too long i just don't have a clue...And i just know that stuart is now laughing at me :o) ...I haven't seen K today online to know if she has these results back yet or not, hopefully laters she will let me know...The boys are going to see aberdeen play celtic on sunday afternoon...Last night at footie training my friend was trying to persuade me to go with them...Hmmm it's the C word i can't go or maybe i should....Am a diehard Rangers fan and don't really wanna go at all...I will take one of the boys or both to a dons home game cos am a NICE mum but celtic erm i have to draw a line somewhere...Don't i???? Sorry about the umpteen alerts people may have got whilst i was fiddling about on journal today...No snow even though it was forecast so no snowman LOL...TTFN xx

Gibberish

Hmmm been playing around with the colours...Trying to get them more festive without having too much green LOL...Think i'll be playing round with them till actual christmas eve...Went and did a search and have now downloaded a whole pile of free christmas clipart so i can brighten this place up :o) I've been looking through all my xmas bits and bobs for making my cards with...I have lots and lots and lots of bits but i thought i might be out of the dinkiest crackers...Am not so that's fine i won't need to order any more...I have a few left from last year but i want to send a handmade card to everyone i give to this year...Need to have a look in farmfoods tomorrow for the right brand sugar for making turkish delight...I have even more people to send some out to this year...Usually i make four lots...One of each of the four flavours i do...Might have to double that this time or ration peeps to 3 bits of each flavour <ggg> ...Might take pics of my cards when i finish them and post them here but only IF i am happy with them LOL...We have more snow forecast for tomorrow hence the snowman at the top...Maybe it will stay long enough to build an actual snowman who knows

Wet monday

In reply to the comments on previous entry *hoodies* are in the main a fsahion item...They also happen to keep someones head warm which in the cold weather we've been having is a good thing...I've got 2 myself LOL...We wore similar jackets when we were young and there wasn't the fuss there is now...When you see shopping centres banning them from being worn i always wonder how many of the shops they have in them sell them!!! Especially if it's a sports shop...Loads of different kinds of jackets have hoods on them should we ban them all!!! Again it's the minority that spoil it for the majority...We all liked to be fashionable when we were young...I wasn't so sad as to wear ra-ra or puffball skirts in the 80's though...I did wear ponchos etc back in the 70's...Hooded tops like is in at the mo came from sports clothing originally and they are very comfy to wear...If it's the only jacket i can get G to wear then no way am i gonna stop him from wearing it...Do wonder if Jack Mcconnell will ever wear his one LOL...K did buy one for herself don't know if hers has anything written on the back though...You know a fashion that was around when she was smaller i consider far more dangerous...Jumpers, t-shirts, hairbands for girls etc with the childs name on them...Now that i would never let my lot have as i didn't think they were safe...We teach our children not to talk to strangers and only to speak to people who know them...Well if you have your name on something in full view it's easy for someone to use your name and if you're little you may think they know you because of that...Think it was football tops everyone got into trouble for wearing when i was a teenager...If you wore your team colours you were branded a troublemaker.

I have spoke to K today obviously as she gave me the link...She is quite pleased with some minor success she had with one of the ministers yesterday...The deputy minister in scotland for education...That minister were cornered by my darling daughter admitted they are not doing enough for young carers in scotland...Yes Jack Mcconnell has doubled the input they are doing to help young carers...That only means it has gone from zilch help to not a lot...He will support the youth parliaments attempts to get it increased substantially...So she's quite pleased with that but will be pushing her attempts for more to be done :o) ...K is quite lucky in some respects that although she is a young carer she is not a young carer to a parent or severely disabled sibling...There are THOUSANDS of very young kids in the scotland and in the UK as a whole having to care for parents and siblings...Care for them in a way that trained nurses and other professionals have to do...They save this country millions every year and have to struggle to do so...A lot of them their education suffers because they can't do homework, have to get up ridiculously early to do care work before going to school...Miss out on a lot of school, out of school acitivites etc...If you're under 16 you CANNOT claim carers allowance...Once you reach 16 you can claim it but NOT if you are still in full time education...you only get it if you are earning less than a certain amount per week and working less than 16 hours a week anyway...K got involved with the youth parliament via local youth action committee...She got involved with it by becoming a young carers rep...If one thing comes from her time in the youth parliament i hope that our scottish exec do more about these vulnerable young members of our society...K got bullied throughout her school days because of her brothers...She did find it hard to do homework etc at times as she couldn't get the peace and quiet needed...She did find it hard to find decent friends, she also found it hard to do activities outwith school...That i am partly to blame for and it would have been easier if only one of the boys was the way they are...She has never really complained much about it and i know she worries about me now being on my own with them...Silly girl...Probably why she never said anything last weekend to me about how she is just now <sigh> ...I miss her terribly and i feel useless not being able to help her just now...BUT i am so glad she did move away from home to go to uni and she now has a proper, *normal* life :o) I really don't think anything much will get done for young carers as whole as they do save the government so much money...Not until someone high up somewhere in power has a son or daughter in the same position...Like many things no-one knows or can understand what it is like until they are in the position themselves...I don't actually know how K or the boys feel as i have never been in their position...I think at last count there was 50,000 KNOWN young carers in scotland...That is a horrendous figure...K was lucky she only had to cope on her own with the boys for a few days whilst i was in hospital...A lot of those have to cope day in day out 365 days year after year...Anyways am getting as bad as K and this has turned into a rant.

G was sent home at lunchtime with a migraine...I need to get him seen as it's not the first time...This time he had flashing colours and was feeling sick too...Got some migraleve from the chemists for him to take...I think it is probably stress related as he has his prelims/mocks/estimates (whatever you call them where you live) in january...The base haven't actually spoken to him much or explained how they will work for him DUH!!!...I reckon her reasoning is not to say too early so as not to stress/worry him...Unfortunately it is having the opposite effect as he'd rather know now so he is prepared plenty time in advance...Apart from that isn't been a none eventful day...Spoke to a friend on the phone this morning and was lovely to hear from her again :o) ...Was going to go to B&Q, homebase and go price some christmas pressies...Will do that tomorrow as i really want to get the tiles laid in the kitchen...We have had some snow on and off mixed with rain all day and it is cold again.

Toodle pip tc xx

 

This is funny

Now this is funny you have to click on the link...As i said K was at youth parliament meeting at the weekend...They gave Jack Mcconnel a pressie LOL...Apparently the Sunday Mail had a pic of him with one airbrushed onto him ROFL...The FM on the pressie stands for First Minister <ggg>

BBC NEWS | Scotland | Hoodie goodie for first minister

New dragon :o)

 

Awww isn't he just so cute :o)  Big thanks to Sara for sending me him :o) ...I love how he breathes fire something to keep us cosy when it's cold <ggg> Would like to say thank you to everyone who left comments on last entry and on wed entry too...I was unsure wether to write about K properly but when i tried to be ambiguous it came out too cryptic...I notice i left out what <cossable> in the states did...She IM'd him to tell him and just for a general natter...She used her AIM as she has her AOL screenie on it...Well first she got asked who is this? ...They know her screenie ffs...Was his wife so she got him to talk...So K told him what was going on and all she got was 'sorry to hear that darling' ...Then he didn't speak again!!!! or even phone her!!!!...Nice to see he cares so much NOT...<cossable> <deleted> <sweary words> <insert whatever you want here> GIT <~~~me being polite LOL...I have always tried to be as nice as possible but K is 18 and old enough to make up her own mind...She calls him prat to me am sure she uses something stronger to others :o(

So on to today...Well it absolutely bucketed down with rain nearly all day...Was so bad it was bouncing a foot off the pavement most of the time...I picked up the boys worker and drove to the cinema down the beach...Then i went to the gym whilst they were there...Shame they don't have a punchbag at it could have been doing with pretending it was a certain someone...I forgot my swimming goggles again...Hate swimming without them so only did 14 lengths before i gave up...They enjoyed the film even though they were stuck with very front row seats which is a bit close to the screen...After the cinema they went straight to club after i dropped worker off at his flat...And that has been it for today...Haven't heard from K so presume either her mobile is still lost (she dropped it in the snow yesterday) or it's found but not working...I do hope she is enjoying herself at the SYP meeting in edinburgh...She's not that happy about having to put up with Jack Mcconnel at it again LOL...I was sad to hear about the death of Richard Burns...He was the only englishman to have won the world rally championship and only the second britishman...Colin McRae being the other...Tragic loss at only 34 from a brain tumour :o(

Toodle pip tc xx

Worried, concerned, kinda i guess

I know it's silly o'clock but i've been thinking...My brain hurts so much now poor brain it doesn't usually get much strain <ggg> ...I've been a bit cryptic last few days about K so decided sod it will write properly for once...A couple of years ago she was fainting and blacking out or seemed away with the fairies at times...One evening she all of a sudden went glassy eyed and collapsed in front of me...I managed to catch her and it was over in seconds really...So next day we phoned gp and got an appointment...She asked me to go in with her as obviously she didn't know what was happening...So our gp back then took her blood pressure and said it was lower than usual for a woman her age...She was 16 at the time...He said with hers being lower than usual if it dropped for any reason then she'd either faint or blackout...Told her to keep eating healthily and not much else they could do...He did mention medication but said it was rare to do that...After a while it did stop but it's now back...Am a bit angry and annoyed that she didn't say when we visited last weekend...She did say she had felt a bit lightheaded sometimes when we were down...I did notice she wasn't quite with it and did ask at the time if she was fine...Her reply was yeah LOL...Big fibber as i have found out now.

As i said earlier in the week she was at the campus doctors on mon...Her boyfriend had nagged her into telling this gp about her fainting/blacking out episodes and she did do as he told HURRAH!!!...I like this young man even though i haven't met him :o) ...As i said this gp tried to blame student lifestyle...Thing is K doesn't smoke or drink and she does eat healthy and plenty...Since she moved she's even eating brekkie, even if it is a piece of fruit grabbed on way to class...So earlier in week they still didn't have her medical notes...Well on wed they had finally arrived :o) ...This gp is saying there is nothing in them about previous time this was happening...Strange as the gp did write it down at the time...I can't argue though am not there to see them, with K's permission of course...On wed her boyfriend went with her and explained what was happening...He also backed up that K is actually eating...Am sure that possibly this gp who obviously doesn't know her thinks because she is thin that maybe she is someone who goes on mad diets to stay that way or be that way...Well she isn't she's always been a nice shape not overly skinny but slender built...So she had to go back on wed evening to get an ecg...Now that worried me but results were normal <PHEW> ...Today she had five lots of blood taken to be tested...Anaemia is one and K thinks thyroid is another but not sure what all exactly...I have queried her thyroid before up here with gp...About 3 years ago she had a touch of alopecia on crown of her head :o( ...From reading stuff i asked about thyroid but got told wouldn't be as she was so young...Most of it has grown back now btw :o) Enuff to not be noticeable which is good...The gp down there is also possibly going to send her for epilepsy tests...Told K that would be an eeg as she won't remember M getting his as she was only 5 at the time...That has to be done at hospital though...I do hope they get to the bottom of it sooner and that it is not something major...I was talking to another J lander about it by email this week and was suggested she test her blood sugars...Her and her b/f are going to get one of the prick test things off a uni mate who is diabetic...It would really need tested there ane then when she faints and not next day or hours later to see if it's them dropping...I've told her to buy some high in sugar/glucose sweets to keep on her at all times to take if she faints...She did again tonight whilst on here talking to me...I phoned her room landline and spoke to her fella...This time they noticed she felt dizzy/lightheaded first then blacked out...So there is some warning...In a way i am now glad she didn't bother learning to drive last year when she turned 17...Main reason was she didn't want to pass her test and then not be able to drive...My car insurance was going to go through the roof to add her on to it...blacking out for a few seconds is bad enuff but at wheel of a car could be fatal...It's just a worry being 140 miles away and not close enuff to help or be there...Anyways i must go get some sleep LOL....It's not nearly so cold tonight but it is pouring down with rain...The boys are off to see harry potter in the morning and think i'll go to the gym then and get rid of some worries for a couple of hours.

Toodle pip xx

snow all gone LOL

Hmmm went to bed with the snow still falling and over an inch on the road and pavement...Woke G up at 7am and there was still some snow on the ground so put local radio on to listen for school closures...There are a lot of schools closed today in the shire but there was only 2 announced closed in the city...But G's school could be open but his transport not running...His taxi firm are so useless they don't inform the local radio so i phoned his taxi escort...She hadn't heard anything but said she would phone when or if his taxi turned up...She phoned at 7.30 to say the taxi had just arrived at hers...So he got his coat on and sat waiting...M was not impressed to say the least when i woke him up at 8am to say he had school...He tried to say he had a sore tummy and i had given him my tummy bug...Hmmm i hadn't and he was fine...I've just phoned the school to see if they could know why...Only thing his teacher can think of is he sometimes doesn't cope well with doing music at the local high school...He's been fine today apart from going there...Him trying to skive off school is actually an achievement but not one i can actually praise him for LOL...Had a bad headache again so went back to sleep once the boys left...When i got up our snow had gone and we had pouring down rain and high winds instead :o(  As i started this entry we had sleet but it's gone now too...The wind has died down and the sun has come up although it is still cold...If you watch the news and see lots of snow in aberdeenshire that doesn't mean the city itself has any...Most of the places they show on the news are 15, 20, 30 miles away from the actual city itself

K has been to the doctors again today and is now waiting on results from blood tests...Am not entirely sure what all they are testing for but the nurse took a lot of blood from her...At least she has youth parliament meeting in edinburgh this weekend to cheer her up :o) ...She switched on her webcam and put it up to her window...Very pretty winter wonderland on the trees...Snow everywhere and beautiful...Hope she wraps up warm with her long sheepskin coat on...If i say anything i'll get 'MOTHER' back at me <ggg> G going to see harry potter had to be cancelled last night so now both him and M are going on saturday morning with andy instead...Hopefully andy can take G to the footie next weekend...It's a big game with celtic <grrr> playing aberdeen...I don't really want to go and see that match LOL...Going to go and make a nice hot cup of coffee to heat me up

Toodle pip for now tc xx

New journal

New journal for anyone interested...It's written by one of the hosts on here and is about her getting back the confidence to ride her horse...So anyone into horse riding go read it may be inspirational for you :o) Confidence  Even any comments left could help her on her way :o)

We have some snow but not as much as the news reports say...Just a little smattering on the road and pavement...Mind you i live right in the city centre so there could be more on the outskirts or just outside the city...Do hope it doesn't get bad overnight as then neither of the boys transport will be running <sigh> It's is very very chilly and we have had some very high winds earlier today.

Toodle pip tc and wrap up warm xx

 

Meeting

Went to the meeting this morning...Found out that it was with one of the psychiatrists...Her speciality is special needs children and she was really nice...Makes a change if it's someone you feel you can talk to and someone you feel understands what you are talking about...For those who are newish to my journal i started it back in february this year because i was frustrated and fed up...I was beginning to be at my wits end trying to get much needed help at the time...Todays meeting was a consquence of that time..Bit late but never mind.

To cut a long story short for the newer readers as my blurb about me says both my sons are on the autistic spectrum...M the youngest of the 2 has a bit of a temper on him...Well i say bit which is an understatement...He can be extremely aggresive and absolute hell to live with at times...At the beginning of the year he was exploding all the time and i couldn't pinpoint a trigger...I pleaded for help from the school doctor but she was useless...Eventually i saw red after one particular incident and went to see my own GP in tears...Result was he was still turned down to be seen again by child psychology and basically the woman we had seen called me a bad mother :o(  My won GP was not exactly happy as he had actually refered him to child psychiatry...So GP refered him again and the school doctor eventually spoke to someone in psychiatry...Today i finally got to meet the child psychiatrist.

She was really nice and really put me at ease...If i get bad vibes off any of these professionals i either clam up or end up getting very angry with them...Actually now it's mainly getting angry as am so fed up of so called professionals claiming to but knowing nothing about ASD's...We went right back to the very beginning of M's life...How was my pregnancy?...It was fine...How was the birth?...It was fine...Did he end up in special nursery or anything or get home from hospital normally?...Was the latter...Then she asked when had i started to notice any problems with him...I said he was diagnosed with semantic pragmatic disorder on the autistic spectrum when he was 6, completely out of the blue...So she asked did he develop normally?...Answer was again yes...When did he start to sit up, crawl, walk etc...As M they discovered M had a clicking hip when he was 2 days old he ended up with a harness/splint thing on until he was about 6 months old...So he was sitting up really really early as he had support...He started to sit up when only about 3-4 months old...He also was able to stand at the furniture when he was 4-5 months old...When he was about 11 months to a year old he discovered crawling...So instead of taking the leap of letting go and walking he got down on the floor and crawled at some terrific speed LOL...So he didn't actually walk unaided until he was 17 months old...This was the only slight delay in his development and was still within the age parameters...He started to talk at normal age even though he did have glue ear...Then he developed epilepsy...So she asked lots of questions about the epilepsy and how it affected him...We were warned back when he was 6 that because he had the epilepsy young and grown out of it young it could come back in his teens...She agreed with that and asked lots of questions...To be honest some of the signs she mentioned i have wondered if it is back but in a different form...Then again it's hard to tell because of the autism, which she again agreed with...With autism sometimes they can appear to be 'away with the fairies' same as could be for absence seizures...She asked why he had been refered to the assessment centre up here when he was 3...I said that was because of the epilepsy medication he was on...It *slows* you down and he was assessed to see if he would need a wee bit extra input to start primary school...So he was assessed and they said yes it would help and he ended up going part time to the special needs nursery in assessment centre and part time mainstream nursery...He did mix with the other kids at mainstream no problem...He mixed at the mother & toddler groups no problem...He was reading fluently by the time he was 3...Unlike G there was no obvious signs of the autism at all when he was pre-school...Now until the psych asked about other children i had she didn't realise G was also on the spectrum...So she asked questions about him to compare with M...I told her that M's diagnosis of being on autistic spectrum was a massive shock to me...Not least because i felt incredibly stupid at not spotting it as G had been diagnosed 4 years previous :o(  She assured me i wasn't although i still feel i was but that's human nature...She asked why M went to SEN school and not mainstream...I said because he was still on the epilepsy meds it was felt best he went there...Worst decision i ever made to be honest...She asked why i moved him to his current school...I told her that was because a) he was being bullied b) he was BORED silly c) final straw was an illegal exclusion...I told her that his previous school do not follow the national cirriculum...The only tests he did whilst there were when i asked for them to be done...Not SATS we don't do them in scotland but tests for the different levels they achieve in scottish national cirriculum...I told her his previous school really didn't believe he had a brain let alone be capable of using it...She asked how is he getting on at this school...I said brilliant they straight away realised he has a brain and can use it...They DO follow the cirriculum as far as any pupil is able to...I told her how much happier he is there where people do believe in him :o)

I told her that in the past i have always managed to spot the trigger for any temper outbursts...I told her how he was when his father emigrated...He wasn't too bad when his father walked out but he was only 6 at the time...I told her that with M it is very visible that something is upsetting him but with G he clams it all up...I told her about his behaviour going downhill after he saw his father again 2 years ago...That was when we first went back to clinical psychology since he had been diagnosed...I told her the reason had been to get help with his fear of dogs and cats...We'd had to wait 13 months to be seen!!!...As his temper had deteriorated the clinical psych tried to deal with that and quite frankly did sod all about his dog/cat phobia...In fact she decided in aug 2004 and she didn't need to see him again and all she did about the dog thing was give him a social story...I also said how angry and upset i was about what this clinical psych had written back to my gp in april/may this year...The school doctor did say she didn't think that clinical psych meant it to come across as me being a crap parent...My own GP said he certainly saw it that way and would have thought that if it was him the letter was about...I said that the clinical psych had written a load of rubbish in the letter and basically had told a pack of lies...The clinical psych had said there was no point in seeing me anymore as M's difficulties hadn't changed and i was unwilling to take her advice and put it into action...I said to the psych today that what she had said was i needed to do what they do at school...Give him time out and some space on his own...In actual fact it was me that told clinical psych that...I told her that i told school to do this as this is what i do at home and always have done...Fortunately the psych i saw today believed me :o) I told her how i use music and specifically robbie williams to try and calm him down...I told her how worried my family are that one day M might kill me by accident when he beats me up :o(  He hasn't been quite as bad as strangling me with force like last easter...She is going to write to head of social work disabilities team demanding that i be given a named social worker ASAP...That more money is made available to get more respite...As she said now K is away at uni we are down 1 carer in the household...Which i am glad about as she does need to get her own life and so far is doing rather well at it :o) She thinks that what i try to do is right and that having 2 to cope with on my own with minimal input is ridiculous...She doesn't think am a bad mother and that helped put me at ease loads...She has asked if i mind her doing some research back through all their files to find out if they have had bloods taken to genetic test...I said i don't mind...She also asked their fathers name and date of birth to see if somewhere might be anything about him...Said i don't mind but if he finds out he'll go balistic...I also told her that i thought their father was on the spectrum and possibly it could be genetic...As i said i have a huge family (42 first cousins) we have made another appointment to discuss it further LOL...There is no-one else like my boys within my family that i am aware of...If there had been any around their age then am sure that one of my uncles or aunt on mums side would have been straight on phone to her for advice...I did say i wondered if M had some ADHD along with the autism but it's hard to tell as some traits crossover...I also want him rediagnosed as it's been so long since it was made...She does agree with me that the temper outbursts this year that have been so horrendous are 98% probability being hormonal...And if you're female then there are very visible signs of hormones kicking in and you can get medical help...If you're male then you don't :o(  I better shut up as this is turning into a mile long entry and i haven't touched on a lot of what was said...Then again i don't want to say all but i am worried about the genetic testing side...Am worried for K's sake and so is she...If they find it is genetic then she is worried about having children of her own...I would love to be a granny but at same time i wouldn't want K to go through all that i have...I would of course support her heaps if that eventuality ever happened...Oh i ended up with a puncture on way back from hospital so car is in the garage hence am here and not at the gym...Waiting on a call as i need to go to asda shopping laters

Toodle pip tc xx

Important Lessons

I was sent this in email today from a friend and thought i would post it here in my journal...Makes you think, well i hope it does :o) I don't usually forward these type of mails but this one i think is good

Five (5) lessons to make you think about the way we treat people.

1 - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.

During my second month of college, our professor
gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student
and had breezed through the questions until I read
the last one:

"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the
cleaning woman several times. She was tall,
dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question
blank. Just before class ended, one student a sked if
the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers,
you will meet many people. All are significant. They
deserve your attention and care, even if all you do
is smile and say "hello."

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her
name was Dorothy.

2. - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American
woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway
trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had
broken down and she desperately needed a ride.
Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.
A young white man stopped to help her, generally
unheard of in those conflict-filled 60s.. The man
took her to safety, helped her get assistance and
put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his
address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a
knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a
giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A
special note was attached..

It read:
"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway
the other night. The rain drenched not only my
clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along.
Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying
husband's bedside just before he passed away... God
bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving
others."

Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3 - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less,
a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and
sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.

"How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.

"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and
studied the coins in it.

"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.

By now more people were waiting for a table and the
waitress was growing impatient.

"Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.

The little b oy again counted his coins.

"I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on
the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice
cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress
came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the
table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish,
were two nickels and five pennies..

You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had
to have enough left to leave her a tip.

 

4 - Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a
roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if
anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the
king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by
and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the
King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did
anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of
vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the
peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the
stone to the s ide of the road. After much pushing
and straining, he finally succeeded. After the
peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed
a purse lying in the road where the boulder had
been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note
from the King indicating that the gold was for the
person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The
peasant learned what many of us never understand!

Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a
hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who
was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only
chance of recovery appeared to be a blood
transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had
miraculously survived the same disease and had
developed the antibodies needed to combat the
illness. The doctor explained the situation to her
little brother, and asked the little boy if he would
be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a
deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will
save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in
bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did,
seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his
face grew pale and his smile faded.

He looked up at the doctor and asked with a
trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away".

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the
doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his
sister all of his blood in order to save her.

Quickie

Just had an IM from K saying she has just become a german tutor for some other student...They are doing beginner german and having a few difficulties...So K is going to tutor her...I said as long as it doesn't interfere with her own studies cool...Means she's also made another new friend :o) Unpaid but don't matter K also feels it will help her with her own german coursework so fairplay...

Chilly tuesday

Hmmm how long does it take for medical notes to get passed from one area to another...I do hope they haven't gone *missing* in the post...K has been and registered with the doctors practise on campus ages ago...Now she has seen one of the GP's there a couple of times since then...She had to go see her yesterday as due to some high jinks on sat night she ended up with rather nasty carpet burns on her back <ouch> ...She was pulled along the corridor and her top had moved up <sigh> ...Anyway she needed to talk to the GP about something else...K has decided she doesn't like this GP as she won't listen to her and is blaming K's lifestyle...She is eating healthily, ok she maybe isn't sleeping much but she never did...Now the problem she is having again she had a couple of years ago...Back then she went to our doctors and took me with her...She needed a witness to what had happened as she didn't know...K has said the campus GP doesn't appear to have her medical notes...So today i phoned our practise who gave me number of practitionary services up here...Her notes were sent away weeks ago!!!...So i've told her to tell campus GP to phone and see where they are...also told her that this woman can phone me and ask me if she wants...I know am being kinda cryptic but i can't say exactly what is happening...What i will say is my older sister is the same and it is a slight worry but K has had bloods done before and nothing untoward as such there...Seems to be a very long time for her medical notes to take to get from up here down to edinburgh...The campus GP is still using a pink slip to write stuff on like they do if you're a temporary resident.

Tomorrow i have a meeting at Child & Family Mental Health about M...I have tried phoning for a few weeks and left messages but no reply...The letter doesn't say who it is i have to see!!!...Bit daft don't you think especially as this meeting could be 1-2 hours long...It's in the old building that child psychology/psychiatry used to be in so at least i know where am going...Hope it's not too chilly as am going to walk there LOL...I do think it is to do with me kicking up a stooshie (fuss) last spring about not getting seen...So 7 months after i was in desperation i am being seen <sigh> I do hope it is someone who actually understand autistic spectrum disorder that i am seeing...If not then there is NO point.

It's cold here again today although not as cold as down south of scotland or england...We do have snow forecast for here on thurs/fri...Hope we do get some as the air will heat up a bit but i hope it's not so bad that the boys schools close...At least G is actually wearing his cosy jacket ROFL...Got a letter home today about his transport...Apparently he is arriving at school before it's open, before even any staff arrive...Bit strange as the time it's alleged he is arriving at school on this letter is the time he is getting picked up at the flat...Now we don't have a star trek style transporter so he can't possibly be arriving at school 6½ miles away at same time he is leaving the flat...Yet another call to the base is in order methinks.

Phoned mum yesterday and the funeral went fine...Obviously they were all sad but they had some laughs too...My cousins asked my mum and sisters to take the biggest wreath back up with them and to put it on my paternal grandparents grave...My auntie was cremated so nowhere to put it down there...Of course they were honoured to and went and placed it there as soon as they got home...Wonder what my dads brother and sister who live there will say...Hmmm don't really care, no-one else went down to the funeral...I would have gone myself if i could have...My dads other sister didn't but as she doesn't talk to my mum anymore she'd have no way of getting there except by train or bus which she's not fit to do...Better go and tidy the kitchen and make some tea and have a wamr bath before I'm a Celeb comes on at 9 LOL

Toodle pip and take care xx

Weekend away

We did manage to get down to edinburgh to visit K this weekend :o) ...I thought it was cold here but the further south we got the colder and colder it got...Missed the turn off on the bypass so had to drive 4 miles before we could turn back...I hadn't gone in that way the last time so wasn't sure where to go really...The sign for the uni appears AFTER you make the turn off on some jumble of a roundabout <sheesh> G spied it and said mum we're supposed to have gone up there...Looked to my right and sure enuff i could see where the uni was...Well all he could do was giggle and giggle until we drove along, turned back and got to the uni...Wee toerag <ggg> ...We got there just as she texted to ask where how close we were now LOL...It was so so cold there that G actually put on his cosy jacket <shock> ...We went up to her room with her and i gave her the pressies i had with me...She loved the necklace she got from family friends :o) If you're reading this she is supposed to be sending a thank you email...She loved the pewter fairy my best friend gave her...Then i gave her my pressies...The tatty teddy with 18 on it she liked...She loved the earrings (different to the ones i put a pic of on here)...She really loved the ring :o) ...Got massive, big, tight hugs for them :o)

After she'd hung up more washing in her room she took us on a tour of the campus...We didn't manage that when we took her down there...Out the back from her halls is a wee loch or pond as K calls it...That morning it had been completely frozen over but it had broken up by then...Lots of ducks on the pond that were looking a bit on the cold side <poor things> ...K said she calls it the pond but most nickname it the swap LOL...It was a very pretty setting and not too deep...I think a lot of chucking people in the pond goes on, usual student high jinks...Then she showed us the block her boyfriend lives in...It does look a bit grimmer than her block...His is nicknamed the ghetto, her block is nicknamed hollywood...There is another block of halls that is nicer and is nicknamed beverly hills ROFL...They have swans wandering about and we saw them...They hang out down by the *ghetto*...Her fella is on the ground floor and they like to bash on his window...Then we spied a grey squirrel running across between 2 buildings...Apparently they have loads along with lots of rabbits...I've never seen a grey squirrel in the wild before...Shame i didn't have camera on me to take pics...She then took us into the building with the shops, bank, canteen etc...M was very impressed with the supermarket type one...Maybe because i bought him some crisps out of it <ggg> After that we all drove over to my friends where me and the boys were going to stay the night...The boys stayed there whilst i took K to asda shopping...I got lost again ROFL...Well i'd only been there once before and it was dark by this time and i was disorientated (my excuse :oP) ...So i got *mugged* in asda again LOL...Not on food as she has plenty to do her through to christmas...I ended up buying her a christmas tree and i am sending her down some decorations LOL...More bedding as she doesn't like the stuff the uni provided as it's too scratchy, toiletries and the like...She was looking at stuff to buy for xmas pressies but she didn't buy any as she hadn't taken her purse...Dropped her back at uni then went back to my friends...Her lad loved having the boys there again :o) Her and me watched Coyote Ugly which i hadn't seen before...Really funny film...Today made our farewells to them and went back to the campus...Ended up taking K to little chef of all places...Well she does love the pancakes from there so her choice...I met all her friends from her corridor in the halls today and they're all lovely :o) ...We didn't meet her boyfriend as he was away home for the weekend :o(  Maybe next time <ggg> ...We got home safe and well not withstanding the eejit that decided to pull out in front of us and just missed my drivers door...Some terrible drivers out there...Not saying am exactly an angel at driving but i do have a modicum of sense...Got home to a freezing cold flat as guess who forgot to set the heating to come on LOL...So we had a good weekend and i am so glad i bought my robbie tickets via his inner sanctum...So many people i know didn't manage to get any...My life would have been a living hell if M couldn't get to go see him again...Off to be a saddo and watch I'm a Celebrity...I love those bush tucker trials LOL

Toodle pip, warp up warm and take care all xx 

Freezing friday

Well no snow today but it is still absolutely baltic here as we say...Both the boys were feeling poorly just before their taxi's arrived so not at school <sigh> ...They better be okies by tomorrow as we are going to see K :o) ...This is really the last chance we have to go down before she breaks up for christmas...Next time will be to take her home along with half her room LOL...Need to go to asda later and buy her some weighing scales...I thought i still had an old set but i can't find them so must have given them away or chucked them out...My mic still won't work even though someone in PC world showed me how he sets his up...I have come to the conclusion that the actual socket at the back of my PC is dodgy...Will take it to the shop next week sometime.

I haven't played with my new toy yet LOL...I was going to read the instructions today but haven't been allowed the peace and quiet to do that...I do need to price memory cards for it so i can put a nice big one in...It has to be one that does video as well as still pics...Can't remember the type the bloke in superdrug said duh!!!...I'll find out easily enough am sure...I got an email back today the same as Sara did in response to a survey on autism i filled in...Link to sara's days is on the left there and if you want to fill in the same survey then click here ...Hope the link works...Better go and pack stuff etc for tomorrow and make some tea...Hope everyone has a lovely weekend :o)   Toodle pip tc xx

Shivering

Well as you can gather from the heading it is bitterly cold here today...We had a smattering of snow early this morning but it hasn't stayed on the ground...G as per usual carried his jacket instead of wearing it <sigh> M put on his warmest cosiest jacket LOL...Me well i need a new winter jacket but just layered myself up for going out.

Before i went out i phoned my older sis and told her about mum yesterday...She gave a huge resigned kind of sigh...Mum is adament she isn't swollen up or infected like she has been twice in last year...Sis did say that me and other sis don't see what is going on so much because we're not seeing her on daily basis...Older sis lives only 3 doors along from mum so she sees her nearly every day...I can tell if she's not right when i phone as sometimes mum can hide it when seen face to face but she can't disguise her voice on phone...Did phone her this afternoon when i got back from town and she's more like her usual self (kinda)...Will just have to see how things progress i guess and being so far from them all there's not a lot i can do.

So i went into town to pay a bill and look for some contact adhesive...I paid the bill but didn't get adhesive...I wandered around a lot pricing games the boys want for christmas...Looked at 2nd hand ones but couldn't find the ones i know am going to have to find that way...On way back home i was walking past superdrug and saw they had an advert up for a digital camcorder for £49...Went in and that branch had none left...They phoned the other branch up here and they had a few left...So i trotted back to where i had just come from LOL...It's dinky, 3.1mega pixels, 4 X digital zoom, can do still or video...It's about the size of a packet of 20 cigarettes and i opted for the metallic turquoise...So much for buying some christmas pressies this week LOL...I get money from mum for christmas so that will go towards the cost...Also means i can record M's school christmas show for mum too see :o) Can give it to their carer to record G skiing etc...Can also use it when we go to see Robbie next sept :o) For half price it's not that bad...I am remebering this is thurs and M has athletics and so is he LOL...We won't forget like last week...Anyways must go as my fingers are seizing up with the cold and that's with the heating ON<sigh> I want proper snow to fall and stay at least the air will warm up a bit then...Mind you as we are going to see K this weekend then maybe not LOL........Toodle pip xx

Things kids say <bless>

Had to put this here...M was such a sweetheart yesterday and today...He told me not to be upset as people we love are always with us...Even when they have died they are still there...Then he pointed to my heart :o)  Now isn't that just so lovely...He did wonder why it made me cry him saying that <bless>

Am actually really worried about my mum and think i'll talk to a friend about it tomorrow...Just last twice she's been in hospital to get drained as build up of fluid that got infected she went all forgetfull etc beforehand...Well she's like that again...She says she is fine though and not feeling sick or got hard stomach like before...BUT she forgot i existed yesterday to phone and say about my auntie...Was after my sisters asked she remembered me...Today on phone she got right narky and adament she doesn't get the oap winter fuel allowance amongst other things...Short of someone manhandling her to the docs i don't know what we can do...Suffice to say am worried she may be going same was as my auntie...I pray she isn't.......Toodle pip and wrap up warm out there it is very very bitterly cold xx

Todays stuff

Well this is such a pilavar that i really can't be bothered...After umpteenth attempt i can get entries to save by using internet explorer <sigh> It's freezing outside, so cold am suprised we don't have any snow...In saying that there probably can be some on the outskirts of the city where G's school is...Got a note home from the base yesterday saying he is owe one of the teachers money for breakfast...He'd been dizzy and lightheaded so she went and got him some toast...I went nuts at him as he gets money every monday for the school week...His answer but that's my money for my diet coke...Told him that if he refused to eat breakfast before he leaves for school then his diet coke can go by the wayside and he can jolly well pay for toast at school himself LOL...He ate brekkie this morning LOL...She also moaned the sleeves of his top were dirty...They weren't but the sleeves of his hoodie were but he could have taken it off and left it in the base...What is it about the males of the species and jackets???? He has a nice cosy winter jacket which he won't wear unless it is absolutely chucking it down with rain...As i said it's perishing cold here, cold enough for snow but he wants to wear a hoodie!!!  He did take the jacket with him today, note i didn't say put it on...He's as bad as my dad was LOL...Dad would wear his thickets jackets on a glorious summers day but in winter he liked to wear thin summer ones LOL.

I don't like the idea of adverts appearing on journals either...I wonder if this means that those who use the webspace allotted to them by AOL for websites will also be forced into carrying ad banners!!!  Been out briefly and the main street i live off has been closed just round the corner...A chimney stack has partially collapsed...Didn't think the winds were that high last nite or this morning...Guess it maybe got damaged with the 80mph winds last fri nite and has now slipped...Anyways i need to go out and buy a sympathy card to post to my cousins as i can't make it to the funeral :o(  Toodle pip and take care xx

Yesterdays entry

Okies first the good news...My teletext is working again...I didn't get a chance to try K's TV last night and was going to this morning...I did test the teletext this morning and it said No Text...Had to go out and when i got back there was no power...Lovely a powercut grrrrr it only lasted about 10 mins so i got told...Anyways after the power came back on my teletext was working again...WEIRD...Suppose it is me we're talking about here LOL...Journals not working earlier was a right pain too but hey ho finally up and running again :o)

There had been a call whilst i was out from one of my sisters...I phoned back and it was sad news...One of my aunts on dads side of family died this morning :o(  ...My mum was quite close to her and she was the only one from dads family who still spoke to us...She'd developed dementia out of the blue about 18 months ago but had got a lot better this year...Am glad i saw her when she came all the way up here to see mum in hospital a year past april...I can't go down south to the funeral as it is early on monday morning but i might go somewhere on my own and just say my goodbyes

Toodle pip and take care all xx

Weekend stuff

Well it's been a downright miserable weekend as far as the weather goes...Bitterly cold, on and off pouring rain, high winds and just thoroughly YUK...My teletext is not working on my telly...Have no idea why and am going to take K's TV through and plug it into the ariel see if teletext works on it...If it does then it must be the TV if not then must either be the ariel or teletext itself...But if it was the ariel then my picture would be affected to and it isn't hmmm...It's so annoying me as i like to catch up on stuff from it...The TV is still under guarantee so if i find it is working on K's telly i'll be going to comet LOL.

On sat i put loads of music off some of my CD's onto my computer...The boys went to their club in the afternoon...Before they went to club i had to rush out and help out a friend who had an accident in her car...One of her tyres had a blowout whilst she was driving it...So she was pretty shaken but no-one was hurt...Bit of luck it happening right beside halfords who managed to fix it later in the day...G had opticians early on sat morning so we left M in bed as he was still sleepy and went down...As they said it could take up to an hour i popped across into poundland whilst waiting...Ages ago i said i had bought some vinyl floor tiles...Well when i went back to get more after i'd workd out how many i would need they had none left in same pattern...So last week i had seen a pattern in that i thought would do...You get 6 tiles in each packet and each packet costs £1...They weight a ton LOL so as i had G with me to help i bought 12 packets of tiles...I think 72 should be enuff to do my kitchen floor...It's quite a big area but awkward...It's not a straightforward shape...I would have prefered to be able to afford to buy some nice thick lino but that would be out of my price league...This cheap stuff will do the job for a couple of years and maybe by then i can actually afford a new kitchen and get new flooring too...I did pull up some of the very worn old lino last night and am going to need to wash the floorboards down first...I was going to pull all the lino up today but the weather is so miserable i don't want to hear or see rain battering in kitchen window LOL.

Yesterday the boys were at respite and i waited in most of the day for my ex brother in law to comeround...Needless to say he'd tried when i was out collecting them <sigh>  Maybe a phonecall to arrange a time wouldn't go amiss...Ended up phoning him to ask where he was...So eventually he did turn up...The boys got their pressies my ex mother in law had taken back for them from the states...G got a model to build of a working engine...M got a solar system mobile to build...Remember  i said she didn't take anything back to K as she didn't know what size clothes she wore???  Well there was a pressie for me...Now i do appreciate it and i love it BUT she could have taken similar back for K too...It's a dragon ornament...You know those glass blocks you get with an image inside them??? One of them with a dragon in it...There's also a base that lights up to stand it on...Ex MIL knows K loves dragons too...As she took home as pressies for other people then why not K...Oh well i really don't think i will ever figure out how that family thinks or works...I feel guilty having been given something when her own flesh and blood got nowt...I'd bought the recent Star Wars DVD 'Revenge of the Sith' yesterday so the boys watched it twice last night LOL...I hadn't managed to see it in the cinema...Was quite good seeing how he became darth vadar...Bit of useless info time here now...There is a big fight scene between anakin and obi wan on top of lava flows with volvanic eruptions going off around them...Instead of uing CGI to do the effects they used actual footage of a volcano erupting...It was either when or before they were making the film that some of the cameramen from lucasfilms went over to see etna erupting...They got as close as they were allowed to and took real footage of it erupting...Now that is dedication to your job LOL...It does give it a bit more edge than CGI.

Today it's been so miserable i can't be bothered with doing anything...G was up at his usual 7am to get washed, dressed, breakfasted before taxi arriving at 7.30am...By 8.50am still no taxi and he was getting very agitated...I phoned the escort but no answer so obviously she had left...I phoned the taxi driver and he told me it was a different driver now (lovely NOT) and that the other lad on the taxi was off school again...Finally at 8am they arrived...There had been a big mix up this morning...They were redirected to collect another lad...They then got stuck in traffic and it's just one big muddle...The taxi firm who have the contract for the base just now are RUBBISH...Am being polite there btw...Most of the boys in the base don't like change especially at short notice...I know we have to allow for things like traffic BUT i could have been informed by the firm they were changing the driver...The firm are also supposed to inform the parents of any changes in pick up times...They DON'T...They're supposed to phone us when term restarts...They DON'T...I've phoned the escort who is also being messed about by them and hasn't a clue what is happening tomorrow...I just phoned the base to complain so they can pass it up further...The base are NOT happy with this firm either...I really hope and pray that when the contract is up for renewal again that they don't get the contract...The base just told me that some of the boys are being dropped off at school before it is even open!!!!...And some are arriving late for classes starting!!!...It BETTER get sorted out LOL...Oh one thing i did manage to get the boys to do at weekend...They finally wrote down a list of things they would like for christmas...They've not done that in the past...This year all they want is games and i can't remember names of them all...So now i have a list i know what to look for...M actually wants more DVD games...The bullseye, catchphrase, telly addicts and family fortunes ones...I have no idea if there are DVD games for all four of them but i do know there is a bullseye one...He watches all these old gameshows on the challenge TV channel on sky LOL...He's obsessed with gameshows...It's muggins here who has to give him answers to questions he gets stuck on...Apparently i am the font of all trivial knowledge according to them <ggg> Anyways must go now so Toodle pip tc xx

My new dragon is similar to this one on siggy Sara did :o)

Thursday night, friday morning take yer pick LOL

WOOHOO!!!! result i hope...Decided this afternoon to email the membership bit where i got my tickets to express my disgust at so called fans selling on ebay...I don't mind the odd one or two who have bought an extra ticket...However when you press to see what other things the seller has some had LOADS of tickets on sale...No doubt touts who paid membership just to do this...I got a reply this evening...They are not happy either and they are negotiating with ebay about...There are specific terms and conditions to the membership and they've been broken...I do feel sorry for those who will have purchased from there...I know a few people who are just like me and didn't manage to get any like i did yesterday...Hopefully the touts will get caught...M is still on cloud 9 and told his friends at school today...He told me who and i was surprised at one as it was a girl...He said he really likes her and she's very pretty <bless> ...He helps to push her around in her wheelchair and hey maybe he's found himself a new girlfriend LOL

Chilly thursday

Oh tut here's me thought i was over that bug and i've spent half the morning on the loo again <sigh> ...Not as bad as it was though <phew>  So am still on cloud nine from yesterday :o) ...M was jumping up and down for ages when i told him...Not a good idea when you live in a first floor flat like LOL...I did forget to say yesterday that K doesn't like Robbie...She only came to murrayfield to see M's face when he saw his hero in the flesh so to speak...Well his face wasn't any different to when he see's him on the telly...However when he got the signed photo through the post his jaw hit the floor...He was totally gobsmacked and kept saying 'Robbie knows me, he knows my name' <bless> ...I have been trying for years to see if somehow i can get Robbie to meet M...Am sure after reading his biography Feel that i am one of the werido stalkers they mention in the book...It would make my day if i could make that happen...It would make M's life :o) ...All i want to say is a huge thank you for inadvertantly making one autistic lads life that much easier to cope with over the last several years...M had never been able to tell me what it was about the music that he liked so much...I knew that certain classical composers music was good for calming people down...Mozart i think is one but i could be wrong...It was about a year ago that M finally managed to tell me...As usual it was totally out of the blue and nothing to do with what we were speaking about at the time...It's the actual music itself and not always the lyrics...He loves the violins etc that are used in Robbies songs...If you ignore the actual lyrics and listen to the music it is often very orchestral in his work...Even if at the end of the day i didn't like his stuff he will always be my hero too just because of how it helps M and in turn makes my life that wee bit easier :o) ...Even K who doesn't particularly like his work says the same...I am totally disgusted with the amount of so called fans who promptly put their tickets on ebay to sell at ridiculous prices.

So on to today...Well i was intending to go to the gym...That fell by the wayside and not just because i am back on the loo...One of the flats right at the top of the block is getting new double glazing fitted...The joiner fitting it is working outside on the pavement and up and down the stairs like a yoyo...This means he is leaving the main door to the block permanently open...Don't like that idea as anyone could just walk in and possibly break in or steal anything on the stairwell...Why the joiner couldn't have taken everything in and cut frames etc in the back garden i don't know...It would have been safer in my opinion...It's rather sad how we all now have to be so security conscious...When i was a kid growing up in a small village we could go out and leave the house unlocked...We all spoke to our neighbours and looked out for each other...I suppose yes it is different living in a city BUT even in that small village my mum and older sis can no longer live that way...I have had prints nicked off the walls of the stairwell here :o( ...Ok they weren't expensive as it was just pics of dragons i cut out from an old calender and put in frames...That's beside the point someone nicked them WHY???? ...Worthless and put up to make the stairwell less bleak looking...I always put up christmas decorations in my section of the stairwell and downstairs lobby...I always use old ones i no longer use in the flat...Lights i no longer need for the tree i put up there too...Makes me wonder if i should bother this year as they too may disappear...Hmmm better leave for now before i go off on a rant harking back to the good old days LOL...To anyone feeling poorly do hope you feel well soon as i know quite a few J-landers are at the mo.......Toodle pip xx

WOOHOO!!!!!!!

Finally after spending hours sat on here since 8.30 this morning i got the concert tickets...We're going to see ROBBIE again next year WOOHOO!!!!!!...M is over the moon as am i...Need to explain a bit here

M is totally and utterly obsessed with Robbie and his music...He has been ever since robbie left take that and went solo...Funnily he never liked take that at all...Robbies music helps calm him down and helps control his autism :o) ...The speech therapist he had 4 years ago said he wasn't only autistic she knew of that robbies music helped them loads...Robbie did once play where we live on his first solo tour but M was too young and very much more severely autistic to take him to the gig...We did go and see him on his escapology tour 2 years ago and it was fantastic...We went to murrayfield and the boys both coped wonderfully well...Mind you the seated tickets i have were in a place they couldn't cope with...The tour reps were next to where we had seats and i spoke to them...I explained about them both being autistic spectrum and we were moved to seats down next to the pitch near to the stage :o) ...The woman spoke to the security people in that area but don't know what she said...She must have said something about the boys as throughout the whole time we were there the security people kept coming over to check we were all okies :o) ...The only thing that cheesed me off was M saying he didn't want to go to the loo...See he couldn't go to the gents on his own and he couldn't go to the ladies...The only disabled loos were behind where the stage was...Security said no problem they would allow us backstage to use those toilets and one of them would take us there...Would M go NOPES...Even when me and K said he might bump into robbie there...But he didn't need to go so he wouldn't pretend...Sometimes i could just scream at his autism being so literal LOL...Anyways we've got tickets to go see him next sept in glasgow and am over the moon and chuffed to bits...I now have just under a year to try and find some way to get robbie to meet M...We tried for murrayfield and failed...Radio Forth did manage to get Robbie to send M a signed pic though...I also now have to face a weekly countdown for the next 9 months then it will change to daily <gggg>  Better go make something to eat for the boys...Am kinda recovered but tummy still doesn't like getting too much food...Can you tell am HAPPY LOL.............Toodle pip xx

PS: the tickets go on general sale next week on 19th nov

Wet tues

Well am managing to keep food inside me so far today <fingers crossed>...Probs gone jinxed myself by saying that LOL...I have tons and tons of housework etc to catch up on <sigh> ...G did go back to school yesterday he has a lot of work to catch up on though...He also managed to go to one of his friends birhday party yesterday tea time...He got a loft back home which was good :o) I did manage to venture into town only to the bank to pay some money into my credit card LOL...Apart from that not been doing a lot...A small parcel arrived here today for K...It's from my brother and his wife...Am in shock ROFL...They don't believe in giving anyone birthday presents...I stopped giving anything to their kids years n years ago...Call me selfish or whatever but even though they are my nephews and niece i didn't see the point in spending money on people i didn't know :o(  ...Besides they don't appreciate them and they don't even say thank you...I did give my eldest nephew in that family something for his 18th & his 21st...I gave to my neice too on her 18th last year...Thing is my bro knew we were going to mums the other week...He could have handed it over instead of sending to here DUH!!!...Oh well he's a pain and his wife is a <cossable, cossable> As they say you can choose your friends but not your family :o) It won't be much anyways not that that matters...My niece i was out with last week got her 18th late as apparently bro & wife were looking for something special...She got a purse!!!!!...Hmmm draw yer own conclusions <ggg> We're going to go visit K in 2 weeks time now as this weekend is not suitable.

Am sorta getting used to AOL9 but i still don't like it...The one thing i do like is the superbuddies that you can make interact with other peeps ones LOL...Now how sad is that...I've been made to put a pic of me on my profile, at least it will scare peeps off speaking to me <ggg> 

Our recycling was going well until i was poorly...It's too far to go to any of the recycling bins so some has just gone out with the usual rubbish...But hey at least we are making an effort...Am missing the gym loads and being a right grump because of it...Hopefully if am okies for rest of today then i will at least manage to go for a swim tomorrow...Off to catch up on other journals and message boards........Toodle pip tc xx

To eat or not to eat that is the question

As we couldn't go away i decided to sort out my computer between running to the loo...So am now finally using AOL9...I still hate it loads but suppose you have to move with the times...I've been using AOL since AOL3 and i always rushed to upgrade when a new version came out...Until it came to AOL6...It was pants and after that i got more wary...I just didn't like AOL9 at all when i saw it...Guess we get comfy with whatever we are using already and don't like the changes...I had a slight technical hitch hence changing but hey ho...Still can't get my mic to work at all...Am beginning to think i have been unlucky and both i bought are faulty...Will try get new speakers next week as i can't afford them this week.

I have to spend loads of money on gig tickets this week hence being broke...Won't say or where until i see if i get them...Have found if i don't eat anything then my tummy isn't quite so bad...If i do eat them am in trouble and have to run to the loo (scuse the pun) K does not want me to give her present to her friend...She wants to get the one from me in person...I will phone her friend to arrange to meet and give her the other 2 pressies though...I did spend a huge chunk of yesterday in tears upset about not being able to go down...G is going back to school tomorrow <phew> M didn't get the part he went for but was given a different part...He was already being a *contestant* in the X factor bit his class are doing...He is a very good singer and is often picked to do solo's in any school concerts etc...He's also maybe playing drums to accompany the music teacher...He's not too downhearted, well he is but not as bad as i was prepared for...We didn't go see any fireworks although saw some out of the window that looked pretty...Right to eat or not to eat i best go decide as i am famished but don't want to spend half an hour on loo........Toodle pip tc xx

Unwell :o(

Quickie entry just to say going no-where now as i have some really nasty tummy bug...Been up since 6am being sick and diahorrea :o(  Phoned K and friend we were staying with to let them know...Am really upset about it but nowt i can do...Just doing an entry so don't get asked how weekend went...Be back when feeling better........Toodle pip xx

Pressie buying and parents nite

Well i went and met my niece at lunchtime...Left G in bed as he's still poorly...So first i bought her some lunch then we went downstairs to the jewellers...She liked the ring and thought K would like it too :o)  We didn't like the earrings or pendant and neither did the assistant LOL...The pendant the assistant showed me as being the matching one was NOT the same as one on website...They didn't have the earrings that went with it...We got a different set of earrings which are small and delicate and will still go with the ring...I decided not to buy a pendant at all in the end...K has already been given either 3 or 4 necklaces as well as the one the boys gave her and one a friend gave her when she was up here...Also i have a necklace here to take down that is from a family friend...So am leaving pendant until christmas time...After we had a good look in the jewellers and decided on what to buy we went for a wander...Got one of the Me to You Tatty Teddy figurines with an 18 on it...They're those grey teddy cards etc you get that look really cute...May go out buy something else with 18 on it tomorrow or give her money to buy something pretty to wear...Mind you yesterday i bought more baking stuff for her and other bits and bobs so not sure...G was ok when i got home but he isn't going back to school until monday...He's a bit more with it but still white looking and a bit washed out and lethargic...M came home and said his audition went well but won't know until tomorrow who got the part...Hmmm all hell will break loose if he doesn't get it <sigh> M also started athletics again tonite and enjoyed it lots...He was learning about javelin throwing tonite do hope he doesn't want to practise at home ROFL

Had parents nite for G and left in plenty time as my first appointment was at 5.20...Bad time to be going out to his school due to rush hour...Whoever dubbed it rush hour needs help it's more dead slow and stop hour...Was pleasantly surprised that where the usual snarl is wasn't too bad tonite...Well not on way out...So first i saw his english teacher...He is far better at english than he thinks he is...The only major problem she has with him is handing in work on time and his lack of confidence...Also that he doesn't use his lappy thing anymore...Told her he's supposed to so she's going to talk to him about it...She did have to put 2 recentpieces of work back to the base as she couldn't read it at all...I told her to liaise with the base and let them know any work he has to do and when it is due back in...But she does reckon he could get a credit level pass at english and would be happy to see him back doing the higher next year...Am well chuffed with that as english has always been a huge problem for him...Credit is highest you can get in standard grade and can be either a 1 or a 2...Either would be fantastic for G to achieve...Netx i had the graphic communications teacher...He is also really pleased with G...Said he is extremely competent at the drawing work and on the computer...He is concerned at him missing some classes but can't help being ill...Later when i passed him i did point out that one of the times he said G had been off for a while was when he had work experience LOL...He's also on track so far to get credit pass in this subject...Next i saw the PE teacher as i wanted to know what this short course was about...The short course used to be a scotvec module thing...Now it's changed they do have to do a written paper and will get an intermediate1 pass...Please don't ask the intermediate grade things are confusing to say the least LOL...The written bit is about general fitness and how to go about training to get fitness better for certain sports...She also said he was a really good goalie LOL...We know that he just prefers to play in defence instead of in goals...Next was Geography...Again he's doing well :o) He should achieve credit in this one too...He had a bit of a glitch in a test last week when it came to the credit paper but they'll work on it with him...He's doing weather studies next am so jealous...I loved weather studies and i still am fascinated with storms, tornados, volcanoes and earthquakes...Last i had technological studies teacher to see...He was the briefest of the lot...I sat down and he said well what can i say...He's a hard working, well behaved, polite, pleasant lad...He has a real knack for the maths side of the subject and is very competent and should get credit pass no problem...And that was it from him LOL...I couldn't get an appointment with the maths teacher but i KNOW there is no problems in that area at all <ggg> I was really really pleased with how it went tonite...Homework i told everyone gets done in the base but i will if necessary ask the base to send stuff home for him to do...Certain areas that need working on (knowledge & understanding) the base can work on him with so he can learn meanings and comprehension of stuff...This is where the prompter with the dictionary will be useful to him in actual exams...At the end of the day IF when he gets exam certificate through next august he has passed them all at credit level i will be over the moon...If he passes them at general level i will be over the moon...Getting a pass of any kind i will be over the moon...I never ever dared to dream when he started high school that he would be where he is now...Ten years ago i didn't dare dream that he would get to mainstream primary school...All i wished for back then was for him to be able to talk...Am still scared to dream of him leaving school and going on to further education or getting a job or both...He's exceeded all expectations for him when he was little...He's gone from being quite on verge of being severely autistic to aspergers and a very capable young man...I am so so proud of how well he is turning out...I was and still am just as proud of K and how she did at school in her standard grades and highers (excellent)...Just with G it is so different as it's not anything that could be expected from him...That sounds bad i know but if anyone has gone through all the ups and down i've been with him then they'd understand...Just spoken to K on IM and she is chuffed to bits with him too :o)  Oh and way back home after parents nite was a nitemare...Took me 45 mins to do a 6 mile journey that out of rush hour takes 10-15 mins <sigh> ...Am off now as am a bit tearful as so happy.......Toodle pip xx

Tuesdays rambles

G is defo ill...He spent a lot of today asleep in his bed and he still looks like death warmed up...He hasn't lost his sense of humour though as when their worker came round to take M out he was laffin and jokin with him...When M came back home their carer was talking about why his hair is now a yukky blonde and his face looks all weird...Was for his fancy dress for halloween nite out...He'd gone as hulk hogan in wrestling gear LOL...The fake tan wasn't quite tangoed but almost which is possibly why the blonde looked yukky ROFL...G piped up from under duvet on the sofa he didn't need fancy dress yesterday as he already looked like a ghost...Poor thing he still looked like a ghost today.

I had to leave G in bed to go into town but he was fine with that...He'd taken paracetamol before i left anyways and was going back to sleep...I know he won't answer the door or telephone either if i need to go out...Had to go to the bank as bill paying time again <sigh> Then i went to jewellers that i know sells Hot Diamonds range...The ring doesn't look quite the same in reality but it is still pretty...It's also very popular and they didn't have one in her size :o(  So i trotted off to debenhams and 2 other places i knew sold them...The other 2 don't sell the rings and the prices were same as on the website...Debenhams no-one would come and attend to me so after 10 minutes i decided sod it and left...If they want custom then they really should have a salesperson on the desk <sheesh> ...Was going to go to John Lewis as it is on way home but popped back into original jewellers...Asked same assistant if it was possible to see if any of their other 2 shops had the right ring size...So she phoned dundee branch and WOOHOO they had one :o) ...It's being sent up and should arrive tomorrow...The pendant and earrings i wasn't sure about from the website and seeing them in reality i am less sure...They have a different pendant which is more pretty but no pic on website...The earrings are too long to be stud type in my opinion and again they have a smaller prettier pair...This jewellers is also much cheaper than the recommended prices <ggg> ...So price i save on the ring almost pays for the earrings...I may get her a bracelet to go with this lot for her christmas...Providing it is one that can be reduced in size as the watch defo needs 2 links taken out...It's ending up almost at her elbow LOL.

I got back home in time to watch the service of rememberance for the 7/7 bombings...I really wanted to see it and it was very moving...G was still asleep when i got home and didn't waken until M got back from school...I am going to have to phone G's school tomorrow to find out what times i have been alloted at his parents nite on thurs as i reckon he is going to be off all week...Am so mad as if he'd had his flu jab when he was supposed to he wouldn't have fallen ill...My mic is still not working and am beginning to think something gone wonky on my XP again LOL...It's not exactly rocket science you plug it in and it works allegedly...The suggestions i have been given i had already tried...Cept for one which is plug it into the speakers...Well i wanted new speakers anyways so might go look for a set that you can plug a mic into...Not this week though as i have enough expense without adding that...I'll check out K's when am down there maybe find out where am going wrong LOL.......Toodle pip xx

Siggy courtesy of Sara again :o)