catchy up

I went to the funeral last thurs... I found out about it on wed evening and to be honest i was incredibly tensed up about it...I hadn't been in touch with her for a few years and most of the people i knew who would be going don't talk to me any more either...But i had to go for myself as i wouldn't have felt comfortable within myself if i hadn't gone along...There were other people there that i know who i never see regularly anyway so i mainly spoke to them...I felt incredibly uncomfortable but am glad i went along...I do wish she had still spoken to me as i didn't know just how bad her depression had become :o(  I ended up with the worst migraine i have had in a very long time on fri, sat and most of sunday and i think it was because i was so tensed up...I was invited to a 50th birthday in a local pub on the fri but i couldn't go...Not just because of the migraine as i would have popped along for an hour just to show my face...But also because i didn't feel i could face some of the people again...Silly really isn't it...I lost a lot of so called friends during the years after me and my ex split up...The irony of that being that most of them were friends with me to begin with LOL...But it is their loss and not mine but it still makes me feel awkward being in their company.

On to less deep and emotional stuff now :o)  My best friend got a dog last week...I went with her and her kids to pick it up...She got it via freecycle LOL...So because i was the one that Bex was sat with in the car all the way back (approx an hour) she adores me LOL...Now as most reading will know M is terrified of dogs so this is a big problem...But he has said he will not not visit my best pal again...As long as Bex is in the garden or in the utility room away from him then he says he can cope...Am kinda hoping that eventually Bex will help him to overcome his fears...It may be that he still doesn't like dogs much but that he is fine with Bex...She is an 8 month old border collie and she is a wee bit excitable...Me and best pal plan to take her out on long walks which is cheaper than the gym LOL.

I have physio tomorrow morning and i've kinda recovered a bit from my 2nd fall two weeks ago...It aches a heck of a lot but not painful as such now...Ok it still hurts if i type too much or do too much at oncebut hey ho...I had M to the doctors yesterday and i asked our lovely gp what he had injected me with last week...It was an anti inflammatory...I said i wished he'd done it before as i actually managed to sleep for longer than 45mins...He said next time he would do it straight away...I said 'next time!!!! there will hopefully be no next time' And he laughed...Actually if i do bash it again i want it to break so i can have it operated on and fixed proper like...It's swollen and feels weird if touched but not painful...Will see what the physio says tomorrow...I have to drive on fri for much longer distance than since christmas...Am going away early on fri morning and return sunday teatime...It's a weekend oragnised by the carers centre for single parent carers...But as i don't go anywhere or do much i ended up buying stuff from asda last night...Pyjamas, slippers, socks without holes, a pair of trousers and a couple of tops...At the moment i own two pairs of jeans that fit me, some vest tops and some old t shirts and a couple of jumpers...The jeans include a black pair that don't really look like jeans...We'll be having workshops and time to ourselves...I've no idea if we have to share a room but am kinda hoping not...With my sleep being the way it is then sharing a room isn't going to be good for the other person.

I did 3 orders off 3 different ebay shops later on fri evening...Am well impressed that two of the orders arrived yesterday...No mistakes and one of the shops am well impressed that they emailed me saying they had sent my order 1st class on mon...I will be using her again as the crystals were reasonably priced for the amount in the pack...Now i know what some of the colours look like in reality i will be ordering more...the blue zircon colour is as i thought and is a gorgeous teal colour...The only thing is i ordered a mixed pack of pinks...A list of which pinks they are would have been useful...When the other order of st silver wire arrives (hope tis right gauge) then i will be making up some designs...I really need to build up a range and then go and find an outlet...Like the craft group although they may not take me on as they have a few already who do jewellery and a few who do cards...But my cards are different to those others and the jewellery is in the main different to the others as well...Fingers crossed although that will be a few weeks away...Their next craft fair is in may and i can't do one in may as i want to be here to make sure the boys study...Well to make sure G studies for his exams in may...Am going because my shoulder is aching now although i have more to say

Toodle pip tc xx